i'm often within an earshot away when my mom is talking on the phone. 80% of her conversation is about setting me up with one of her many korean girls. my mom said something funny today. she was talking to one of her gradeschool friends trying to set me up with her "pretty" (i use quotes because i cant trust my mom's superficial scale) daughter. she said this about me.
"if you take his niceness away, you got nothing"
it doesn't make me laugh anymore. because it's actually kinda sad because i'm not nice at all. inside this thin shell of niceness, lies a great evil.
my own mom thinks i'm below average ):
28 October 2007
27 October 2007
one more Ardaya
yes folks. for those lucky and blessed people to know Ivy & Dave, they now have a little one to mold into any type of human they want. i will keep praying that they choose wisely (:
congratulations dudes. God bless!
congratulations dudes. God bless!
19 October 2007
our janitor lady aka ajima
so we have this janitor lady that cleans our section of the building. all the americans call her ajima because apparently they're too good to learn her name. i, on the other hand, am not too good for anyone. the girls find this hard to believe. i call her by her name, mrs ___ or ___ shi. she likes me and she likes to talk to me. i'm the only one in the area that can speak her language so you shouldnt think she likes me that much. the funny thing (and a bit annoying) is that she asks me questions that she knows the answers to. such as...
- i just changed into my workout uniform and she asks, "are you going to work out?"
- i have my keys and hat in my hand walking out the door, "are you leaving?"
- i just got back to the office with lunch in my hand, "are you having lunch now?"
- i'm super good looking with a chiseled physique, "are you a babe magnet?"
- i'm walking back to the exam room with a patient, "is that your patient?"
- i'm sitting at my computer typing an email, "are you working?"
- i'm washing my hands in the sink, "are your hands clean?"
i'm always very polite when i answer her, sometimes with a smile. but recently, i've been chuckling when i answer. i can now predict what she's going to ask me when she sees me. so i've been trying to do odd things so she'll ask me odd questions. i've had my Hoff mask on as she walked by, she laughed and asked me nothing. i turned off the lights, turned on my Christmas tree lights, and stared at it; she laughed and said nothing. i was beat-boxing to Alvin and the Chipmunk's "all i wants a hula hoop" and she smiled after a confused look and asked nothing. i know what you're thinking. i do have friends. and true friends dont judge me from a blog. and true friends dont read my blogs. actually no one reads my blogs. i'm so lonely ):
that sad face is the revolutionary emoticon from wolverine
- i just changed into my workout uniform and she asks, "are you going to work out?"
- i have my keys and hat in my hand walking out the door, "are you leaving?"
- i just got back to the office with lunch in my hand, "are you having lunch now?"
- i'm super good looking with a chiseled physique, "are you a babe magnet?"
- i'm walking back to the exam room with a patient, "is that your patient?"
- i'm sitting at my computer typing an email, "are you working?"
- i'm washing my hands in the sink, "are your hands clean?"
i'm always very polite when i answer her, sometimes with a smile. but recently, i've been chuckling when i answer. i can now predict what she's going to ask me when she sees me. so i've been trying to do odd things so she'll ask me odd questions. i've had my Hoff mask on as she walked by, she laughed and asked me nothing. i turned off the lights, turned on my Christmas tree lights, and stared at it; she laughed and said nothing. i was beat-boxing to Alvin and the Chipmunk's "all i wants a hula hoop" and she smiled after a confused look and asked nothing. i know what you're thinking. i do have friends. and true friends dont judge me from a blog. and true friends dont read my blogs. actually no one reads my blogs. i'm so lonely ):
that sad face is the revolutionary emoticon from wolverine
09 October 2007
sock puppet and japanese dude
my parent's friends insist on talking to me through my parents even when i'm right in front of them. i don't need a translator. i answer back in their native language so i dont have to conversate back at them through my parents. i find it very odd and a bit rude that they dont look at me or talk to me directly. what if i my parents are not here and they want to talk to me? who doesnt want to bask in the majestic glory of me? am i to bring a picture of my mom so they can talk to it? how about a sock puppet with an afro on it? that's what my mom looks like; pale woman with an afro. before you get all "dude, that's mean" on me, let me add that i'll get a clean sock and not a smelly-dirty one.
i was in seoul yesterday hanging out at one of the university districts. by the way, we've been having great fall weather. a japanese guy walks up to me and starts to talk to me in english. his english was very good. even though i'm yellow, i still stick out in a crowd. my baseball cap, tshirt, shorts, and flip flops. the tall white guy next to me is a big hint too. what the japanese guy wanted was some help with the language. he wanted to order flowers for the korean girlfriend he loves. little did he know it was a stretch for me to order it, but he had no idea. neither did his japanese friend that spoke less korean. the guy was a great guy (i dont even know what flowers were and that i should be buying them for the ladies) but i let my country down. i aided in the love relationship of a japanese man and a korean woman. they'll probably get married just because of my radicalness. that's one less potential wife for me in this country too. what if she was the one? what have i done!
i was in seoul yesterday hanging out at one of the university districts. by the way, we've been having great fall weather. a japanese guy walks up to me and starts to talk to me in english. his english was very good. even though i'm yellow, i still stick out in a crowd. my baseball cap, tshirt, shorts, and flip flops. the tall white guy next to me is a big hint too. what the japanese guy wanted was some help with the language. he wanted to order flowers for the korean girlfriend he loves. little did he know it was a stretch for me to order it, but he had no idea. neither did his japanese friend that spoke less korean. the guy was a great guy (i dont even know what flowers were and that i should be buying them for the ladies) but i let my country down. i aided in the love relationship of a japanese man and a korean woman. they'll probably get married just because of my radicalness. that's one less potential wife for me in this country too. what if she was the one? what have i done!
04 October 2007
expensive cow
my aunt from dad's side took us out to a famous restaurant. they say it's one of the oldest restaurants in the country. it dates back prior to japanese occupation, as i was told. they're famous for their bulgogi and nangmeun. so my auntie bought us both. it was probably the best $80 plate of beef i've ever had. and yes you can say it's the only $80 plate of beef i had which also qualifies for worst, ugliest, sexiest, death-defying, gayest, and any crazy adjective you want to throw out... in? seriously, it was good. unfortunately the $80 didn't come with an endless flow of cow, rather a very small amount. the cold noodles was very authentic. i guess i am not a big fan of the authentic flavor. guess i'm too white to enjoy it. you can also say my mother is too white then. then you'll be messing with my mom, and boy them be fightin' words.
02 October 2007
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